Bringing Home the Bacon

Bringing Home the Bacon

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bacon wrapped scallop by FotoosVanRobin on FlickrI’ve been busy trying to build a couple of careers so I can go from “Mom with a Job” to “Career Woman with Kids.” Lately I’ve felt as though I’m merging onto the Autobahn, pedal to the metal with barely enough time for a shoulder check. I’ve got to get there and I’ve got to do it as fast as possible.

As I face my new career rush, I’m wondering how I’ll maintain my personal and parental responsibilities, and make it through a divorce with my mental health intact. I’ve come to the realization that being able to “bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan and never, ever let him forget he’s a man” was a load of bull crap. We can’t do it all – that’s why we have partners.

Marriage is supposed to be a partnership between two people working towards the common goals. When this doesn’t occur the marriage breaks down, or results in the unhappiness of one or both partners.

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When I think back to that Enjoli commercial, I can’t help but realize the media had an impact on my hopes and dreams. I thought I could be Superwoman and do it all. I suppose I still can, I can do anything I set my mind to but it’s not going to be as easy as I first thought. Doing it all is less important to me than finding balance in all areas of my life. Being Superwoman now means being happy and managing the responsibilities I choose for my life.

I recommend going back and watching some of those old commercials. If you were alive when they were on television, you’ll be surprised you were so accepting of them back then. I highly recommend reading one of my all-time favorite posts by Diane Guercio ( @heyamaretto on twitter) called “You’ve come a long way baby but you’re coffee still sucks.” Although you may think it’s because she mentions a conversation with me, the real reason I love that article is the awesome collection of old, sexist commercials and her insightful thoughts on them.

And for the record…. I don’t fry my bacon anymore. I wrap it around scallops and grill to perfection. Sometimes you just have to adapt old recipes to suit your own personal taste.

Image by fotoosvanrobin

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Comments

  1. There are months when I think that the goal of getting through this mess with sanity intact may just be the straw that will break the camel’s back. There’s a reason that they invented Prozac, I tell myself.
    I am glad that your career is going well! It really isn’t easy, but it’s YOURS.
    And we eat our bacon in junior bacon cheeseburgers from Wendy’s.

  2. I wish you all the luck in the world as you search for that balance. Personally I think it’s something that you have for periods of time and then lose and have to regain as life continues to roll forward. Nothing in the world ever stays the same.

    I’ve known for more than 20 years that no one ‘can have it all’ – something has to give. Getting a divorce when my daughter was 5-1/2, having a full time job and a house that needed continuous upkeep meant choosing what was most important. My decision to forego a personal relationship was met with a lot of opinions by a lot of people who had no experience walking in my shoes. In the end our life is ours to live as best we can. Choose what works for you today – tomorrow will most likely bring another set of choices for you to make.

  3. Diane – prozac. Never thought of that, will have to look into it. So far, vodka and cranberry has worked in a pinch. 🙂

  4. Thanks Marie. You are absolutely right, balance is the bane of my existence, when I get it right I’m going to record it so when I lose it again I know how to get it back. I’m finding I’m easily letting go of responsibilities I previously thought were important. I think that it’s much easier for me now, since my children are teenagers, I’m not sure how I would have managed if they’d been young like Lindsay. Tahnks for taking the time to comment. 🙂

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