Is This The End of Men?

Is This The End of Men?

"What if the modern, postindustrial economy is simply more congenial to women than to men? For a long time, evolutionary psychologists have claimed that we are all imprinted with adaptive imperatives from a distant past: men are faster and stronger and hardwired to fight for scarce resources, and that shows up now as a drive to win on Wall Street; women are programmed to find good providers and to care for their offspring, and that is manifested in more- nurturing and more-flexible behavior, ordaining them to domesticity. This kind of thinking frames our sense of the natural order. But what if Continue reading

Stuck in the Middle with You

Stuck in the Middle with You

Having been first born in my family and first among my friends to have children, be married, get divorced, the middle position isn't a familiar place to me. Yet, it seems that's exactly where I am. The middle of my life. Mid-life. I've spent much of the past couple years looking behind and evaluating. The current year has been a period of looking forward to make future plans. Helen's death stopped me in my tracks and I began to evaluate this moment of time in my life. When I met her I was a young teenager, she seemed so much older and mature. She was a single mom, working hard Continue reading

Riding the Bull: Recognizing When Resolution isn’t the Game

Riding the Bull: Recognizing When Resolution isn’t the Game

The tensions mount as you stare eye to eye trying to come to some sort of understanding. Breathing is getting heavier, blood pressure is rising, and you realize this discussion is not going to be easy. Whether it's a coworker, family or friend, you probably know a bull but don't recognize it as such. You may even be the bull! Here are three tell-tale signs you're dealing with a bull: Any request for a change in behavior turns into an argument unless you back down. There's no rational reasoning to points made when the discussion is emotionally charged. You have Continue reading

The World Needs Different Kinds of Minds

The World Needs Different Kinds of Minds

There are many forms of inequality. One is to assume that one type of learning style or ability is better or more beneficial than another. I disagree. There is a purpose for every person on our planet, we need to determine what that purpose is rather than requiring they become something they're not. This process begins in our schools when we force children who learn differently to adapt to styles that are in opposition to their natural skills. We then point out when they fail and they lose confidence in themselves. Instead we should be embracing those differences, finding their Continue reading

All the Wrinkled Ladies: Equal Media Time

All the Wrinkled Ladies: Equal Media Time

Growing up I'd hoped that society would catch onto the unrealistic stereotypes that media promotes through advertising. While managing retail boutiques in the 80's I knew then that our size 12 to 16's sold out a lot faster than our size 6 to 10's. Most women didn't look like the emaciated models that were on tv, in magazines and for whom they seemed to design clothes for. Fortunately, companies caught onto this double-digit sized market, and there are some half-decent fashion choices for larger women now. What surprised me over the past 20 years is that media hasn't become more Continue reading

Mother’s Day Gifts

Mother’s Day Gifts

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh Does setting aside a day to recognize mothers suggest we don't have to appreciate them the other 364 days of the year? Expressing gratitude for those who have helped us grow should be a regular occurrence. Make Any Day Mother's Day My grandfather regularly brought the investment of my grandmother's time and love to the family's attention. He didn't wait for a national day of recognition; he let us Continue reading

International Women’s Day Celebrates Past Present and Future

International Women’s Day Celebrates Past Present and Future

International Women's Day celebrates the economic, political and social achievements of women past, present and future. Women have many achievements to be proud of. The equality we enjoy is the result of the work of women (and men) before us. And yet, even in North America, many of us experience the residual discrimination leftover from years when we were not so fortunate. Regardless, none of us can deny we are lucky in comparison to women born in many other countries. The following video asks the question: "If all women had rights equal to those enjoyed by men, would there still Continue reading

The Rewriting of History

The Rewriting of History

My good friend Nathalie sent me the book eat, pray, love by Elizabeth Gilbert. It tells the author's story of her travels and personal insights after a failed marriage. It arrived the day after I signed my divorce papers. I've been trying to save it for the few days I'm taking off next week, but I can't help myself; when I have a few quiet minutes, I pick it up and read one of the short chapters. Today I read this: "I am inspired by the regal self-assurance of this town, so grounded and rounded, so amused and monumental, knowing that she is held securely in the palm of history. I would Continue reading

C’mon Baby, You Know You Like It

C’mon Baby, You Know You Like It

"The slutty party girl is fun until she pukes on the floor and then she's a pain in the ass." House, Season 5, Episode "Lucky Thirteen" What's interesting about this statement isn't just the obvious inequality of how males use females; it's not always a male-female issue. She's great as long as she's entertaining "me" but as soon as I have to take care of "her" I'm not interested. Another way of saying it? "Do Me, Do Me, Do Me." "eeewww I have to do you?" It's not just men who have this issue. How many women do you know that eagerly lay back to enjoy special treatment Continue reading